My husband as many of you know took a different job at the beginning of my illness. It was supposed to be about 25% travel. Slowly it has become 100% travel. This has been very difficult for our family. While I am feeling much better than last year I still have my days but now have the mental health to push through for my kiddos. It isn’t easy-going all week without seeing the man you love so deeply but it has become our new normal. There have been a lot of adaptations along our journey and we have learned to roll with the punches.
I have grown myself, as a mom, and as a wife this year with all that I have gone through. I don’t take little things like energy when I wake up for granted in more. I don’t take the 2-3 days I see my husband for granted anymore… I seize the moment. I also have become much closer to my kids as I have spent many evenings helping with homework, taxiing them, and sometimes just laying down beside them to talk about life. There are the things that make me thrive. I love life even with this illness. I love my family! I love that my faith has been restored. Faith in the Lord, in my family, my friends and even healthcare.
I had a dr. visit yesterday at the pain clinic and had some injections done and the SI joints bled alot because I waited to long for the steroid shots. I hurt pretty bad afterward and my legs were weaker than they ever have been in the past times I got these shots. But, I just decided that this too shall pass. I have too many blessings to worry about those things that can heal with rest.
I am now working full-time but just had a surgery to fix some problems after I had some internal prolapse from a hysterectomy. After my surgery, which was supposed to be outpatient and on the day before Thanksgiving, I hemmoraged and had to be packed and then taken back for another surgery. Thank God for great nurses that caught the problem and monitored me so closely and kept the doctor informed. It could have been a lot worse.
I am still slowly healing from the surgery. They said it could take 4-6 weeks and I believe it. I have learned I over do things after surgery and it sets me back. I have been exhausted this week.Resting when I can so I can try to work more next week.The thing you learn about any autoimmune disease is that you have to take things slower and listen to your body. You become an expert on your body and how it feels. You learn what each pain, cramp, and weakness might mean and how to handle it. You learn that when you sleep all day you probably needed it. There are so many things I have done different now that I am on a treatment plan and have went back to work. I try to eat better, which can be hard around the holidays. I try to rest when I can. I plan ahead for dinners. I make less trips up the stairs if I can.
One things I haven’t spoken much about is how amazing my husband has been through this. He has held me in his arms in the middle of the night while I cry out in pain. I have kept him up all night on my really bad nights trying to take 3 or more hot baths. I have had to wake him up for him to rub my muscle spasms. I also struggle with restless legs sometimes and he will lay his legs on mine to provide pressure to calm them. He has been so supportive. He got so frustrated when the doctors couldn’t help me in the beginning.Beyond my Lord and Savior, Shane has been my rock through all of this.
My kids have been helpful too. They have learned how to do laundry, cook easy meals, and help a lot more around the house. This has been so nice!
I have some amazing friends too that help me by listening to me ramble, help with carpools, and be encouraging! Thank God for people who understand and truly love me unconditionally because sometimes all I can do is just be a listening ear as a friend.
I challenge anyone with an illness to try to be more positive and look for the good things in life even if your pain or disease takes over sometimes. I challenge you to still find something each day that you are blessed with or you are thankful for. My life is totally different now but I love it and am so much better because I have accepted my new normal.